Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Threesome in a minivan. New low
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
