I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
