dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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