He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
