YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
