I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Randomize
