can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
