what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Randomize
