Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Send help, water and tortillas.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
