Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
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