I think I just saw someone hide a body.
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
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