U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I hope mine doesn't look like that
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Randomize
