Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Randomize
