I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Randomize
