I'm drive I can fine osifer
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
