kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
