Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
im about as happy as oj after his trial
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
