I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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