Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Randomize
