Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
