I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
