yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
