just survived the first fart of the relationship.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Randomize
