Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Randomize