I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
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