Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
