Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
