You really coming over, don't trick.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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