South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Randomize
