i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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