I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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