When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Randomize
