Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
