Nicole vs. Life
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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