as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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