just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
