He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
