Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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