I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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