I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Randomize
