Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
