Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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