More tranny stories later!
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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