The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
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