you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
