it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
