I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Randomize
