What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize