UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Randomize
