So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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